Diary, Me

Aimless wants!!

This is one of those times of my life when I feel completely aimless and lost.  Like a child thats lost. Lonely in a crowded city.Talking non-stop Smiling random smiles at people my mind vaguely registers or recalls. Totally directionless. Staring at space trying to locate a world that is different from mine. One which would be more lively, more happy and interesting and yet carefree. One that would take the heaviness off my mind and shoulder. Would remove the thoughts that weigh on me like a boulder balanced on my back.

I sometimes think this Utopia does exist afterall. And that the way to get there is simple. I just close my eyes and wake up there. My deficiencies erased. Traceless. My worries wiped off. Clean. My life begun. Again. Anew. Afresh.

I would not want to do things way too differently anyways. I wouldnt want to know a different group of people either. I wouldnt want a different family. Infact i dont want too many different things. I just want to be treated differently.With more respect. To feel the freedom to say what i think knowing fully well that my intentions will be understood, and taken in the right spirit. And to smile genuinely at those i like.And hug those I love freely. And not have to smile meaningless smiles at people I barely value.   

And to love whole heartedly.


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